Dumb Job Ads: Two Crazy Craigslist Ads

Craigslist is so full of bad ads that I’m trying to avoid using them as fodder for my little series on Dumb Job Ads.

But today, two of them struck at once. It was like being confronted by that dual lightsaber thing that Darth Maul use: I couldn’t go left, I couldn’t go right. Stuck.

Here’s the first one:

Internet Hacker/ web promoter needed

I need a person that is very good with driving traffic to website. I am not so much concerned about how my websites look, but about it making money.
Will work out deal depending on your capabilities.

What a fantastic idea. He wants to make money on the internet without worrying about all that design stuff so many others fret over. Sadly, he seems to be living in the year 2008 (almost) rather than 1998, which is where his thoughts seem to be stuck.

I really like the fact that he calls the job title “Internet Hacker”. Hey, at least he’s honest. I’m guessing a “web promoter” is his idea of an internet carnival barker.

Every time I’ve heard someone start off with some phrase similar to “I’m not too concerned about the look of my website. I just need…”, they oddly become one of the most unreasonable people on the most vile of design issues.

“Is there anyway the little pixels on my screen can look more like a real book? They look kind of dotty on my work computer.”

“I like the blue you used, but I think it should be a shade darker. Can you send me twenty shades above and below it so I can choose?” (No need to mention to such a client that screen colors vary more widely than professional batting averages).

“I’m looking for a very certain font that will totally blow away the competition. I’ll know it when I see it. Do you think you can come over and we’ll go through all the fonts on the internet together? With your internet expertise and my total recall of an advertisement I saw in GQ about seven years ago, I’m sure we’ll easily and quickly find that font in a matter of minutes!’

Here’s the second ad:

Looking for a web designer to partner on great site concept

I am a satup looking for a web designer/developer who is willing to partner with me to make some great site I have a number of business plans and domains but I need a designer to help me get them off the ground, I have very little startup money but I am willing to work with you to make these ventures happen. Please respond if you are interested in learning more

The “satup” is actually a “startup”. Spelling will be one of your partnering skills. These are what I call “dreamer ads”. Instead of the dreamer actually doing any work to reach their goals, they put up an ad to waste other people’s time telling them about their dreams, all the while not able to contribute any real money toward seeing it come to fruition.

I think almost everyone could post an ad like the above dumb ad. If you want a new custom home built, try this: “I am a landowner looking for a general contractor who is willing to partner with me to make a great new home for me and my family. I have a number of ideas and some old lumber lying around, but I need a contractor to get it off the ground. I have very little money, but I’m willing to work with the contractor to make this house happen. Please respond if you are interested in learning more.”

Be careful! With a strong ad like that, you might have a dozen contractors begging you to come “help” you build your dream house. You could get overwhelmed with offers.

I’m starting to think that Craigslist should at least charge a $1 to post an ad - just to keep idiots from figuring out how to clutter up the site with dumb ads like the ones above. The one-dollar would at least keep out people who can’t manage a simple e-commerce transaction.

Related posts

Why not leave a comment below and continue the conversation, or subscribe to my feed and get articles like this delivered automatically to your feed reader. If you don't have a feed reader, I recommend using Google Reader to start. It's free and easy. Otherwise, you can always have these articles delivered to your email inbox every day. Click here to sign up.

No comments yet.

Leave a comment

Line and paragraph breaks are automatic. Your e-mail address is never displayed.
HTML allowed: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>